If you let me
I’m here for it
Because I love it
It pulled me in
Before I even knew I was hooked
I didn’t need a line
I was baited
I’m a water sign
And she threw a net
I was just a disciple
It resurrected my why
It keeps me educated
When I’m a dropout away
It’s the endorphin
To my day
I chase that high
With humor
Sarcasm, puns, and the dark
All types I try
It calms me in a way
Distracting from my excuses
Keeping the No’s at bay
I’ve had worst reasons
From the squinting
To the cheeks
It’s worth it
These last few weeks
I’m here for it
Maybe only for that
I find myself thinking about it
When I should be conscious
I’m a waste of space
Just living in the past
No doubt you’re riddled
With bullets
That left faults
Those don’t occupy my thoughts
From the creases
To the lips
My fascination
Has yet to cease
I doubt if you sane
It’s so quick
And seemingly effortless
Like a lighting bolt
It’s fitting that it’s so bright
Like a line of cocaine
I took the hit
And continued my day right
I considered rehab
Turns out I’m better
At giving up quitting
I’m back for another tab
I’m here for it
I have no choice like the present
I’m not much for cliches
But I could inhale this carcinogen
And still ask for a light
With a tank on my Right
Are you of the summer?
You’re still a cancer
Ridding my day
Of some darkness
It makes each step
Feel less than a mile
And the slow ticks
Less of a trial
I’m not sure what this will become
Thank you for outdoing the fucking sun
It gave me a purpose
When I forgot to pose
I’ve never been good with time
This gave me a way to keep track
Forget a dial of the sun
Let time walk instead of run
You cut me deep
Reminding me that I have a heart
Have me going deaf
Listening with my eyes
I’m here for it
Because I’m intrigued
A piece by van Gogh?
I can’t hear you
You’re a master
And that stroke
Is my favourite part of the piece
It holds my attention
So subtle
But an unmistakable signature
I would recognize that on any feature
It defines the title
For the hearing or deaf
Leaving dementia to forget its use
Authentic in a way
You doubt your own realness
Suing yourself for plagiarism
Feeling guilty for tracing
Even though it’s your own
DNA
A pleasant surprise
In a well thought out horror
And a balm to my eyes
A pacemaker to my tachycardic mind
A relief to my stress
Some order to my mess
You’re a problem
That I’m content to not solve
A variable that doesn’t belong
An eclectic soul
That I’m content to enjoy
Your laugh and your realness
Your faults
Let out streaks
Of your intelligence, your hopes and dreams
A reminder that everyone has trials
Thank you for not hiding the seams
I’m here for it
Your smile and so much more
If you let me
Epilogue: The previous lines were about a particular human. Due to my current state of mind and my various ailments that includes but is not limited to self-doubt, self-consciousness, fear, and love of being a hermit I have yet to make my thoughts known to them. Most likely I won’t because I will think of countless excuses. At the worst these feelings gave rise to this piece so there’s that. Hope you enjoyed.
